My Theodore Was Afraid Tonight
It Made Me Sad
I Hold Him In My Arms
And The World Drifts Away
I'll Never Get Tired Of Holding Him
Safe In My Arms, My Life Is Answered
I Have Done All That I Need To Do
I Will Work To Buy You Nice Things
And Life Will Drift Away Slowly
Like Autumn Leaves Changing Form
And Drifting Into The Carpet Of Earth
We Will Be Okay I Believe We Will
I Will Love You Until You Are Not Afraid
Whatever Is Chasing You Is Hunting Me Too
Has Been For Many A Year
You Told Me You Were Afraid With a Strange Look
You Were Trying Not To Cry
Being Followed Is A Terrifying Thing
I'll Carry You And Keep You Safe Here
You Can Go Out Into The World
Courage Makes The World Go Round and Round
I am not afraid Of Whatever Is Out There
I Will Hold You Until My Day Is Done
Life Is Long and Hard And Sad
You Press and Press Forward and You Pray
Bit By Bit You Gradually Find Your Way
Life Settles Down And Goes On
You Will Be Fine
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

If I only had a little heart
I'd dream up to the sky,
I'd life my life without a fear
And never have to die
I'd eat and bathe and live my life
Like little creatures do
At close of day I'd fall asleep
If Only there were you
If only love was not the thing
That keeps the heart still beating
If only heartbreaks had an ending
then there would be an answer
If only I Had a little heart
I'd dream up to the sky
I'd live my life without a fear
and never have to die
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Pray"
Pray When You Are Most In Need
Pray When Things Are Not Looking Right
The Heart Is The Most Painful Instrument
It Never Ever Breaks
You Cannot Truly Break A Heart
It Never Truly Dies
It Just Wanders around and takes another form
Things are reborn
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Angels"
God Will Send an Angel To You
In Your Times Of Need
To Bless You And Keep You
To Shine A Ray Of Sunlight On Your Face
To Make You Well In Times Of Crisis
There is No Darkness No Shadow Too Dark
Shadows are Only Shadows, After All
They Evaporate In The Morning Light
There Must Be an Answer, After All
Hope Pushing Its Way Up Through The Soil
No Matter How Badly Love Gets Trampled, It Rises Up
Ever Persistently Pressing Forward For The Light
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

I Loved You And I Love You
With A Fear Never To End
Living Day To Day To Hold You
I Awaken In Your Arms

Love Like Little Roses In Spring
Love in Pineapples At Christmas
Love In The Warmth Of A Smile
Love In Happiness And A Gentle Nod
Love Blooming In Hearts Unable to Thank You
Love in Gratitude Noone Knows How To Express
Love Slumming it Love Working Hard
Love Having a Hard Time Getting By
Love afraid of being wiped effortlessly away
Love That Cannot Go On Any Further
Love Just HAppy To Be Alive
Love Takes Some Getting Used To
Love Growing Up Through The Sidewalks
Love Dancing around the mucis box
Love Happy and Well Fed
Love Singing Its Own Little Song
Love In The Middle Of The Night
Love Doing Its Laundry
Love Driving a Minivan
Love being angry
Love when nobody Wants It
Love That Just Needs A Home
Love In Fear Of Dying
Love All Over The World

I Love you and I Love You
These Things I can't express
My Love for you so beautiful in its reality
No Knowing what the future holds
No Knowing Where the future goes
Or Where It may yet take us
Not realizing how much it will cost
or where these hopes are leading
Oh world that fickle happiness has cast into the storm
Oh man that even all the world refused to keep thee warm
Oh what the heart and what the blow that made you all alone
Oh What the world that cruel Wind should dare to freeze thee down
Oh what the God who didn't care Oh why the world forgot
To Take In A Lamb All Shelterless Oh World How Could You Not

The Little Green Things Growing Up From The Ground
The Sun Sliding Over The Horizon
The Tempestuous Weather Following Me Home
Pounding And Beating Driving Rain Down On Me
The Long Stretches Of Unmonitored Highway
Warehouses and Factories Separated By Landscaping
Little People Going In And Out Here and There
Hurrying Around In Little Cars

"What The World Needs"
God Came To My Windowpane Yesterday
He Came Up To My Cheeks In The Form of The Breeze
He Blew Against My Cheeks and It Made Me Smile
The Room Was Gauzy and Breezy and Sunlit and Soft
He Told Me Good Things Were Coming Soon
That Everything Would Surely Get Better
He Asked Me How The People Were.  I Told Him
That The People were frightened and walking around
Looking and in need of a Savior.  I Told Him
The People Had No Bread to feed their Children
The Spirits Had No Place To Rest Their Head
The Angels Were So Hungry and That They Love Cheese
And Butter and Vegetables With a Helping of Meat
The People Are Afraid and they walk around frightened
That the People are all praying To God and listening for a reply
With All Their Heart, That The World Is In Need Of A Savior
He Smiled and Didn't Say anything and then He Went Away
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Corn Soup"
Oh, What Could Be Happier Than A Bowl Of Corn Soup
Sauteed Corn and Onion and Potato
Boiled In Milk and Broth with Butter and flour
Drowned In cups of hot cheddar cheese!
In Jesus' Name,
Amen!

"Warmth"
If I Could Give The World A Gift, It Would Be The Gift Of Warmth
It Would Be An Electric Fireplace For Every Room
Then The People Could Warm Their Feet In Peace!
A Little Hearth For Every Living Room and Bedroom
And A Teapot Full Of Peppermint Tea With Sugar and Cream
And Some Fresh Vegetables, Onions and Chicken Stock
And A Little Red Meat, Hamburger, to eat
And Someone To Hug and Love, A Cuddle Buddy
And A Mirror To Look In The Reflection at Oneself
And Some Running Water and Bathroom
And A Refrigerator with an Ice Maker
And an Oriental Rug
And Some Stuffed Animals and Little Knicknacks
And A Bookshelf With Wonderful Little Books
And A Soft Bed To Lie The Head and Sit By The Fire
And Warm the feet. Above All, just a little fireplace
Happiness Is a little fireplace burning in the night
Giving off warmth and heat burning in the night
In Summer or Winter It Is Hope For The Human Race
And I Wish That Animal Had A little electric fireplace
they could sit and warm themselves to the heater
Animals die so much because they are cold
They also diee when they are hungry but cold
Cold is the saddest way to go it's dcark and alone
you just pray that love will come in the form of a little fireplace
that someone will love you enough to give you what you need
animals and people would live so much longer with an electric fireplace!
It would save so many lives!  Warmth Is A Healing Medicine to all!
In JEsus' Name,
Amen

"Love Conquers All"
Love Will Always Win No Matter What The Odds
Love Has A Way Of Working Out Its Purposes
No Matter What May Come Love Will Overcome
There Is No Distance Love Cannot Reach For
There Is No Prize To Divine To Claim
If You Love With A Sincere Heart
 And Your Heart RingsTrue
Then There Is No PAth Your Heart Cannot Clear
Your Dreams and Hopes Will Follow Through
Love Finds A Way Where It Was Forbidden
Noone Can Penetrate The Love That Is Shared
Where Two Are In Love There Is No Helping It
Sweet Victory to True Love and Let The World Celebrate
When Love Knocks Hope Wakes Up and Answers the Door
Hope Just a sleepy voice welcoming you in from the cold
You come in and shake the elements off you with a smile
you are whisked in and kiss your cares goodbye
love will endure year after grueling year
on and on it persists as long as the heart persists
Love brings us Home at the Close of Day
A Home Is A Place Where Love Is
We Come Home To The One We Love and Day's End
That Is All One Really Needs From Heaven
Love Conquers All
In JEsus' Name,
 Amen

"Love Conquers All"
Love Conquers All
It Gets Us Through The Pain When We Can't Breathe
We Choke And We Cry And Loss Is Felt
The Gripping Pain Tears Away At Our Hearts
Loss Like A Blur On The Windshield
You Feel Like You Cannot Go On
You Try To Cry And The Words Hurt So Bad
You Pray and Look at the One You Love
You Love him much more than you can ever know
You love him so much you are dying to hold him
You are getting old to see him again
You'll wait into eternity you gave your whole life for this
You look back and you don't regret it
You just want him to come home and hold you
Your heart is so full
You know he will hold you for the rest of your life
You smile and watch him wash his hands
The food is warm in his belly
You give him your heart and it makes you happy
All your life you've wanted to be with him
You gave up all the world to marry him
You don't want to look back
You're hungry and you're scared
You're praying for some light to see you through
A Light in the night is all the hope you need
You keep looking for the light on in your little home
You come home and go to sleep and get up the next day
Dying isn't an option anymore because life goes on and on
You just live your life and go to sleep and wake up again
The Feelinigs Wash Over you like breakers on the beach
Love Conquers All
In JEsus' Name,
Amen

"Love"
Being Kind Hurts So Much
You Give OF Your Heart and Smile
Something Leaves You again and again
You Feel Lost
You Don't Want anyone to know that
You really Don't Know What The Future Holds
You Don't Know If Everything Is Going To Be Okay
You're Holding On And Praying One Day At A Time
Sometimes Hope Is The Faintest Glimmer in the Storm
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Memory"
The Little Boy Is Lost
Lost In Something He Can't Understand
I Look At Him And I Pray For His Little Heart
All Hard And Knotted Up In A Little Ball
I Cry For Him And Promise To See Him Through
I Think About The Ones I Have Loved
I Think About The Ones Who Have Loved Me
In My Life There Have Been The Ones Who Stayed
My Life Goes On And On But I Am Lost In The Past
The Ones I Love Dance Into and Out Of View
Always Coming Never Going Into My Heart
Noone Has Come Into My Heart In A Long Long Time
Yet I See Them In My Heart And I Feel Happy
All Lost In Time It's Good To Be Alive
I Wake Up And I Walk Along The Shoreline of The Sea
I Miss The Ones Who Loved Me
I Loved Them Hopelessly and Joyfully
Now They Are Fallen Away From My Life
My Heart Clutches In This They Call The Present
It Is Haunted By The Ghosts Of A Haunted Heart
The Faraway Essence Of Me Is Lost In The Past
My Little Boy Suckles And Nods In His Happy Bed
These May Yet Be Among The Happiest Years Of His Life
We Are Making Memories Without Realizing It
Traditions Layers Themselves Like Surf On The Beach
My Grandparents Make Me Cry So Hard
Because I Loved Them More Than I Ever Knew
When I GRew Up And Moved Away I Never Left Them
I Live On In The Past In My HEart
Sometime It seems like I am fighting this Old War Forever
As Though The Future Were Some Dime Dream Unfathomable
Memory Is The Dearest Thing I Know

"Loss"
I Don't regret what I have lost
I'd Lose It All Over Again Happy Me
The Things We Make Make Us and We Lose Them
Oh Reverie Going On and On
I See Something They Don't See
The Loss Was Beaten And Taken Away From Me
I Smiled And Thanked My Lucky Stars
That I Was Finally Free
I Don't Regret The Loss ever again
I Don't Ever Want To Go Back there
I Want To Run and Run and Spread My Wings
And Fly Away Into The Light Of The Raving Sun
The Bright And Beautiful Sun
In JEsus' Name,
Amen

"Love Poem"
I Wasn't Lying When I Told You That I Loved You
I Loved You And Life Lost All Its Meaning
I Have Been Chasing You Through Time And Space
I Just Look And Look On Your Sweet Face and I Smile
I never get tired of hearing your pretty voice
I Wasn't Lying When I Told You That I'd Die For You
I'll Follow you till the sun chases the moon across the sky
I want to live on with you and never die
The Cold Weather Makes me happy and I smile and pray
I hold you in my arms and it is all I want from heaven
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Prayer"
I Hope I Can Find Peace In The Things That I Have Now
Because I Don't Think There Will Be Any More Things Again
I Long For Material Possessions Because They Make Me Happy
But I Lost The Way Back And So No I Am Forced To Beg
I Wander From Heart To Heart Begging For Our Daily Bread
Humility Never Counted So High As This Little Way
I Pray For Peace And Satisfaction in the things that I already have
That I may not need things I do not have because we are so poor
For Peace In My Heart to overcome Poverty, This Is My Little Prayer
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Freedom"

You Look Up At The Stars Shining In The Sky and It Gives You Hope

You Realize Why You've Been Fighting This Crazy War For So Long

Liquid Hope Sent To You And Me You Look Up And Realize Why We're Born

Like Just Flying Away Could Never Do Anyone Any Harm Anyway

Hope Is A Firebird On An Autumn Night Coming In To Take You Home

I Hope The World Never Realizes How Beautiful It Is To Find Sweet Freedom

No Hope Greater Than This, Oh Freedom To Fly Away

In Jesus' Name,

Amen

"You Get Lost"
The Sun Moon And Stars Wheel About Silently Overhead
The Children Of God Sing And Give Joyful Praise Always
They Praise God For His Gifts That He Gives Us Life and Light and Home
Beams Of Sunlight Falling In Makes Us All Feel Joy
Happiness Is Not Limited We Can Find It And Chase It
Over Valleys And Hills Into Lands Far Away
The Universe Keeps Going And Going It Never Ends
You Just Start Somewhere And Go And Get Lost
You Get Lost In Time And Space like a bird over the ocean
You skin your knee and you cry you get up and move on
you remind yourself how you're never going to skin your knee again
your heart gets broken you cry and cry you have to get up
life goes on and on dying isn't anything to laugh about
the body falters and dies the heart gets sick it breaks
you can't let go of life you keep going you just go on
it's a terrible thing to die there is no other poison
the stars sing and wheel silently by all night long
happiness is just something we seek day after day
we go on and on the trick is just to never die
You get lost in time and space like a leaf struggling to hang on
it drifts and falls softly with a breath of wind to the ground
like babies get old and fly away like children need a home
like grownups are children too like you and me
Like all the sky bowing to a little moth in a raging storm
you just hang on and never let go
You Get Lost
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"God's Love"
You Stand In The Doorway Looking At Me In A Faraway Way
It Makes Me Realize With Gratitude How Much God Loves Me
Your Hair falls about your shoulders like a fur or a swath of lace
I swallow when I see you look so pretty you are my only friend
I got lost and don't know the way back and I don't want to lose you
Oh How Much God Loves Us He Loves Us With an Everlasting Love
He Cares For His Children More More Than You Can Ever Understand
God Looks So Carefully After Every Lamb and They Are Never Fallen
They Are Never Lost To God He Gently Holds Us In His Hands
The Blessings Of God Are So Kind He Is Telling Us He Loves Us
The Gift Of Love Is A Blessing Only God Can Give Us And We Should Thank Him
Because He Gave His Son For Us And He Loves Us And He Has Made A Home Here
God Makes This House A Home He Has Barricaded the front Door
He Loves Us So Much
In Jesus' Name.
Amen

"Joy"
I Hold You In My Warm Arms
I Hope You Feel Safe And Free
I Want To Help You Fly Away
I Love You With All My Heart
I Hope You Find Hope For Your Little HEart
The Storm Is Blowing On And On
Into The Night The Storm Races and Drifts
Far Out Of The Realm Of Understanding
Into Visions Of Madness Where Only You And I
Are Cocooned Safe Within This Little Home
Sometimes I Feel Like We're Lucky To Be Safe
Like Life Meant To Take Us Away Long Ago
Like The Gods That Put Us Out Of Our Houses
Have Fallen Asleep Or Wandered Off
Like All The World Can Pass Us By Forever
They Go And Go And Go We Are Safe Here
Safety Is The Only Thing We Know
You and Me Our Arms Around One Another
Our Bodies Pressed Against One Another
We Sleep Pressed Tight Fast To Each Other
Happiness Comes Like The Milky Moonlight
Beaming Into The Window At Three In The Morning
Or The Morning Sunlight Like A Gauze In The Air
You Gaze at the sunlight and feel inner happiness
all the world loses its mind in the sunlight hours
at night they all go to sleep but not for us
we cook spinach and fish in butter and dance
we listen to christmas music in our underwear
noone knows we are here and they never will
i just want to hold you in my arms forever
we wanted to be buried in our side by side graves
we lay here now and I feel like my prayer was answered
to lay with you under the stars is my idea of paradise
i hold you and all my cares just fade away
joy is our secret world we feel so much joy
joy
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

My Hope Is My Greatest Resurrection
In Thee I Am Happy Made
Crucified By Your Well-Earned Tradition
We Are Slain That We May Never See The Day
Yet In Our Walled Tombs A Happy Reverie
This Joy That Thee Canst No Longer Steal
Peace On Earth, And Goodwill Befall Thee
We Testify Of God's Omniscient Good Will
We Testify That The World May Bow Before Him
And All The Hills And Valleys Be Made Smooth
One Running Over, Another Crossing Under
And Looking High On Every Outlook And Rill
We That Were Slain Tell The Joy That Befall Thee
And How Happy We Were To Die For One Another
On Battle High Nor Valley Low Was Never A Sweeter Voice
Than My Soulmate Coming To Me From Up The Hill
No More Sad Tidings Bring, The One I Love Is Home Again
Resurrected By God's All-Powerful Omniscient Love
Oh Vacated The Houses and The Little Cottages
But Oh How Sweetly The Angel Sings
Yea, And Over The Housetops All The Angels Are Calling
I Thought They Were Calling The Prophesied Apocalypse
All High And Low And Hopes Were Astonished
I Would See You Again For No Other Wish
And Happy I Love You And Happy I Stay
And Little Flowers But Grace The Heart That Lays Here
Here In This Little Tomb All Hard and Tender Hearted
The Days Of Christmas Fly Oh Surely Infinitely Past
The Winds That Blow Never Shall Annoy Thee
This Tomb that is our Only Home Sweet Home Alone
We'll Live Here And We'll Die Here and We'll Die In Bliss
That Love We Hold So Dearer Than Before
No Ruin Will Destroy Us Though We Lay Here and Pine
No Dark Time Shall Decay Our Unvanquished Hearts
No Powers Of Hell Can Outnumber Our Hearts By Far
And In Our Transgressions, We Happy Be
All Hell Knows Not The Fury Of Our Revenges
Yet Just Now We Are Content To Sit And Love
To Beg, To Steal All Manner Of Offenses
That Life We Hold So Dearly Ours To Keep
May True Love Vanquish Thee and May We Survive
And Live To Know The Love We Love So Much
I love Thee, I Love Thee, My Babbling Heart Has Cried
And All Hell Did Withstand Until the fall of dusk
You Come To Me And Hold Me In Your Arms
Truly I Lost All Meaning When I Saw You
How Mad I was To Abstain and Hurt You
How Cruel My Heart The Day I Hurt and Beat You
No Answer To My Broken Heart Did Find
No Cure To Soothe The longing That I Miss You
Oh Fool I Was To Take Your Love For Granted
Oh Fool, Oh Fool I Was To Yell and Hit You
Of Life dealt me a harder blow in June
I Lost The Love For Whom I'd Long Been Dying
And Though I Lay Awake Warm In My Tomb
Oh Christmas Day Heard All Her Bells A Crying
The Phoenix Rose And Gave Great Mourneeful Cry
So Brave and Sharp The Heavens Started Listening
That Hope Befell On Every Human Ear Unhearing Heard
And In My Loss Felt How Oh Time Unyielding
How Dare The Sacred Arrow Miss Its Mark
How Dare The Road Betray My Lonely Journey
To Abstain The Path I Seek Is Against God's Law
To Turn Aside From The Ways That I Am Seeking
To Tell Me I Am Doomed To Lose My Love
And Take Him When He Unawares Lay Sleeping
Oh Cruel Arrow Thee Shalt Rue The Day
That Loveless and Hopeless My True Love Lay Sleeping
Without An Answer and Without Hope
In The Dark Foreboding Room
The Devil Danced and Demons Growled
Against My Wall In Shadows Lurking
Oh Evil Evil Thee Shalt Rue The Day
That My Love Was Scorned and All Was Turned To Woe
Oh Rotten Tyranny sank the heavy World
and all my sweetest dreams did overflow
the kings were asking me How I Would Like To Die
And I Was Writing Poems To My True Love
If Satan Had Another Place To Haunt
The Holy Hosts Deserted For My Savior
Oh Satan Witchcraft Blushes At Thy Prowess
And Never Were You Tempted To Obey
This Demon Too Long With Me and In Me Hath Been
Oh Devil Tormenting Our Cursed Hearts
We Pray To God The Father Of Us All
We Messengers Oh Sent The World To Awaken
All Hearts Have Hoped For The Lord's Cry To Call
And We Wait With An Expectant Open Ear
We Wait With Hope Yeah Even Hope That Little Bird
That Bird That Keeps Us Alive in Times of Torment
That Bird Whose Winds Do Land Upon Our Backs
And Flies Us To To The Lands Beyond Our Knowing
Oh Second Sight Wert Given Me For A Reason
I See That I Do Tell The World My Visions
I See The Wings Of Eagles On Our Backs
And The Devil In The Cornes Being Cruel
I See That Animals Are Not Our Friends
Too Mean They Seek For Meat To Quench Themselves
White Roses pant for water in the dark
and all their pain undying Still
The Devil broke my heart he broke it clean
Like a Hot Knife Searing Through The Flesh
Oh Mortality Woe Has Never Yet Me Seen
And I have Tasted Of The Flowers They Call Death
Have Died and Found Myy Phantom On The Wall
A Crying and begging for her bread
All Hell Hath Not The Fury To Bring These Two Lovers Home
And God Has Left My Theodore and I For Dead!
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

When we hold one another we answer life's mysteries
I don't know if this is true for anyone else but it is for me
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Love"
Oh Angel of light shining in the night
He has seen a vision inside this temple
Oh Holy night Oh dark and dim
No Darkness there could therein Penetrate
There is nothing funny in a falling tear
our hearts have been breaking so very long
we pray for an end to our pain a peace a release
as though hope know no way it could not go
i pray for them and i look up to the stars
 shining bright in the sky like your eyes and i cry
i cry with everything i have left in me
if i could hold you then there woulld be an answer
peace for all mankind and hope for the world itself
when i hold you all darkness ebbs and dies away
darkness severs and fades and goes fast away
when you kiss me there is hope for us all
the answer is in your love
If there is something that can save os from this curse
it is that you love me and in your love all hope and reason
and there never will be anything greater than your love for me
and there will never be a higher truth
there never could be!
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Evil"
If I could Curse that which kills and mains
that which tortures and abuses the soul
that enemy that noone has neart to talk about
that which is not human and knows not enough evil
the devil of which there seems no escape
but there is an escape there is a way out i tell you
there is a way out of this that we can see and can understand
through reason and intelligence is the answer
we will yet think our way out of this come hell or high water
there is no curse angry enough no scorn too mean
that devil hat not enough fury and he never will
hell will never see the end of torment and death
but to the souls it seeks to steal an end to their pain
when I grow weary of that which plagues me I go for a walk
I walk in my heart when I feel like I cannot take it anymore
when I feel afraid like noone can every find me here
I pray to God and I find the sanity to get out of the problem
I pray and I promise myself I will escape the conundrum
I promise myself there will be an answer and that's why there is
there is always an answer, there is a way out
our sufferings are not in vain not any of us
we are fighting for a reason that devil will fall
he will fall and beat grim into the paounding dust
there will be all grim and glory and he will be no more
that which destroys us is that hell we cannot seems to overcome
that which taketh away
that demon that is a disease in the form of lucifer himself
we are fighting the devil and he makes me so angry
it does no good to pray for him, he hates being prayed for
he is the most infuriating and really terrible person
if he can think of it, then he will do it
all hell and terror and he will never be filled
on and on through the night he gets his revenge
evil is a hungry thing and it takes and takes
that is that which destroys us all
sometimes I think the only way to overcome it is to lose
in our loss and pain we overccome that which kills
if i lost the war, if i die, then i will have won
sometimes losing is the only way to win
it's so ironic that failure is the only way to live
but we all make choices in our lives
that which kills will kill again and again
i saw somwthing terrible and it broke me heart
I may be forever trying to understand it
I have never seen anything like this that I saw
as though I had never seen it before
sleep took me and I fell into a dream
it was so cruel that it tried to invade our house
that is why i fell on my knees and I prayed
the devil, he was overcome this morning, he came
he comes every night in the middle of the night he is terrible
oh darkness and hell let me quench thy diseases
that darkness is a light in the night that cannot be won
oh hope to cure that terrible thing we call evil
that which i saw was not human and it was not alive
it was never alive and it never will be
there is something wrong with the world for imagining that darkness
and though hell beat and beat against our little house
yet  Theodore held me in his arms and all goodness broke through
to shimmering light like a shimmering mermaid gasping to breathe in the breaking dawn
and i looked into your eyes and fell into your arms and i felt safe again at last
and I always will
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"To Hell"
Oh Hell,
We Will Endure And We Will Prevail
Though The Wind Be Feirce and Weary and Wild
There Is No Star Marked There Is No Wandering Dream
There Is No Lost Hope That Were Not Held Too Dear
There Is Nothing We Would Not Do To Save Your Life
No Rhyme Nor Reason Vast Enough No Science Intolerable
There is no fathomless Impenetrable that We Would Not Endeavor
There Is No Hope Too Great that we would not salvage
That Demon that Awakened in the night too cruel to live
And No demon has nor ever will prevailed against
and never will this cause too great for me all lost I see
and Hell hath not enough fury to quench it
that in us which is divine and great is not a measureable thing
it is not of substance noone can keep it
the Great war shall be fought and Won and none shall deter
Our faith in God that wandering Star
We Think of Evil and We Pray for thee
Thee art too wicked and too great in thy scope
Noone could attest to thy horror
there is nothing anyone can do but fight
there is really nothing left at all to do
we fight you and we give our lives and we fall and we die
that which is see in my dawn's light and have not heart to tell
the distance between heaven and hell
In Jesus' Name,
Amen!

I Think about how I am dying here now
I want to hold you in my arms forever
I don't want to die I want to marry you
I will never stop trying to get back to you
Home is a place I cannot let go of
It's the place I find you here with me
I will wait for you here forever
In Jesus' name,
Amen

"To Theodore"
I love you more than rhyme nor reason
Some world I never want to explore
Out there my life that I would have had to live alone
because I don't want a life that is without you
When we die we will lay us down in some peaceful place
and we will be happy then as we are happy now
love complete and true is all that ever was
I wish I could be the one you marry
I see you in pain and it makes me cry
I feel I will never stop crying for you
your pain twists and aches my heart in ways I do not know
I get lost in your eyes and never want to be free
when I am done I will fall into your arms
you will hold me when the world is falling all around
my love for you is an ancient and pure thing
like the books I wrote for you that tell my heart
I've written them all my life and I always will write them
I write them because I'm madly in love with you
Love can mend a broken heart and love can heal
through our lives, it is the only real form of healing
that is all anyone has anymore, just to love one another
It's all that we really have anymore it makes me cry
inevitable love and love you cannot understand
things happen and we want to hold the one we love
but we cannot hold them in our arms where they will be safe
so we cry deep in our heart where you will be safe
my love for you will endure and I will feed you too
you will never be hungry and when you are I will cry
my heart is breaking to see you in pain and I pray
I wish I could reach out and help you darling
some day  our life won't  be this way
someday I'll have enough to care for you
But for now I will just hold you in my arms
I love you feverishly and terribly
not knowing what to do yet I love you still
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

I love you as much as I could ever love you
All through life, just me singing "I love you, I Love you"
My love for you is like a tree full of doves
It's like I lost everything and got it all back in you
Like everything was returned to my heart in your arms
when you hold me I remember why I had been suffering
It was so that I could fall in love with someone like you
In JEsus' Name,
Amen!

I held you in my arms like you were my little child

I just didn't want you to ever die

I want to marry you and be your protector

I want you to be happy

In JEsus' Name,

Amen

When You Left Me Sleeping In Our Soft Bed

I had a smile like a candle in my heart

I loved you then as much as I have ever loved 

I had this joy in my heart that was only mine

I knew I would never lose the love that we shared

I knew we would be together in eternity

And the love we had now would be ours forever

When you left me sleeping in our soft bed

I had this terror that you would not come back

It was the most maddening feeling a terrible fear

I knew I could not live a moment without you

On the day the Good Lord Takes You From Me,

Will Be The Day That I Am With You In Heaven

I Love You Like Air Like Water Like Light

Like Joy Passing Over My Face As I Go Christmas Shopping

I Loved You All My Life and Life Teaches me to love you more

Life teaches me that you are my only reason for living

When I am alone my heart is wonderfully full

I know that the love we share is something perfect and divine

There is nothing that could tear us apart and I love you more

more with every passing day that I am alive with you

The only thing worth living for is my love for you

and I hope we will always be together in heaven

I love you more than I can understand and more than ever

If I can hold you it is my own heaven 

there is nothing I would not do to make you smile

no little thing I could not journey to find you

there is only you and I, here and now

I love you

In JEsus' Name,

Amen

I love you more than I can explain
More than I've ever loved before
I love you like air and water and rain
I want to die in your arms
I want to lay beside you forever

"Faith"
My Faith In God Is Like A Candle In A Room
That Hasn't Seen Light In A Long Long Time
Things may be too dark to see anything clearly
Yet through the chaos Faith is holding on
It seems my Love for my Sweet Husband Is So Huge
My Love For Theodore Is More Vast Than I Can Understand
It's Bigger Than Madness and It's More than Sadness
And It's more than the Voices Inside My Ears
My Love For Theodore And My Faith In God Are More
Than Anything I've Given My Life To or anything I've Believed In
You Give your life to the Ones you Love and You Keep Living For Them
You Endure You stay alive you don't give up
You just keep fighting and having faith
you can get through things you don't understand
In JEsus' Name,
Amen

I don't care what the future holds anymore
I live life one day at a time one moment at a time
life blurs into darkness and I lose sight of time
But I am still alive after all these years and that is a good thing
I don't care what tomorrow holds nor the day after
In my way I've done all the things under the sun
I feel joy when I am telling a story about who I was when I was young
and I have nothing to prove to anyone just going on and on
If you don't care about the future noone can ever break your heart
We never die
In JEsus' Name.
Amen

I loved you and I lost you but your could never have been mine
you just didn't belong to me i found myself eternally alone
in heaven i wait for you night after night and i wait until i wake up
i am waiting for you to join me and you never come i get tired of waiting
so i get tired and go out to look for you
i like being alone.  I was born alone and I have always been alone
my life's greatest moments were lived alone alone i feel so alive
being alone is my comfort because I am just the bravest thing I know
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

We Will Have Courage
We Will Have Courage And If We Die It Will Be Okay
Because We Will All Die Fighting and That is what matters
To die still fighting is a glimpse of eternity
We will be hopelessly headlong strong and brave
We will run into battle and kill the enemy
We will fight for out brothers and sister and for our favorite foods
and all those things we had when we were little
we will fight for the human race and we may die trying
but we will have courage and that's what matters
Courage is the substance of the divine
When I look back at my life I see instances of courage
and I am not afraid when I am alone
i have never been afraid on my own
though i walk through the valley of death of any great fear
I am not afraid and I am not alone
Even if God betrays me and when he leaves me for dead
I am still not alone.  We will have courage
if the world is crashing falling down all around us
still yet it will be Our World
and noone can take it away from us the Human Race
You fight for your planet you fight for your planet
you die fighting and you look back on your life
and you smile deeply in your heart because when you see your life
you see instances of courage
you live your life with courage all the courage you have
and when you die you remember how brave you were
that is enough of heaven to temper any hell
no matter how deep
courage is really all that we have when in doubt be brave
there is no stone unpenetrable even death can be overcome
you just keep going.  If you have enough courage it doesn't matter
it doesn't matter whether you go to heaven or hell
 because you know who you are
You are alive you are real and above all you have courage
Courage
In Jesus' Name

"Courage"
Courage is not being afraid
It is a kind of stupidity and they say it is a madness
It is looking at something dark and not feeling a need to run
Courage is to look someoone in the eye and walk past them
the part of us that simply must endure through whatever comes
you look at something and you simply know you are going to survive
and you do because you have faith in god courage is confidence
it is a way of knowing that things will somehow be okay
Courage is a confidence in oneself to penetrate whatever darkness
that the darkness one will go through will be overcome
always that you can get through absolutely anything with faith
Courage is not being afraid
In Jesus' Name
Amen

"The End"
I Came To the End and I Saw Myself
I saw there That I Was Brave and Tough
That Courage Had Largely been the substance of my life
I saw that I was not afraid in darkness
and I cursed the darkness then with all my heart
because my heart was full of light
you can make a paradise from a hell
i do, it's all in the heart
if you have a good heart there is no darkness
that you cannot penetrate
 i was me and i was tired
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

Your Wife is Mending your little pants by hand
So that you will be able to come and go happily
The needle creeps its nose in and out of the thick cloth
Anchored by a simple knot, thick thread in pink or blue
Your tiny little waist somehow fits into these little knickers
there are coins in your cargo pockets and the color is fading
These pants have already been sewn here many times
In Jesus Name,
Amen

I held your hand this morning
It was soft and gentle and warm
You were sleeping I was happy
You seem so timid and shy
like a leaf or a flower or a sleepy tree
blowing gently in the wind
I was grateful to hold your hand
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Happiness List"
A little rope swing or hammock on the balcony
Candles letting go of the summer warmth
Hot tea and coffee in a teapot
Earrings out on tables and brooches and pearls
Lamplight in the windows on a rainy day
When it's just starting to get cold out
Blankets for the cold nights
Warming one's feet to a fireplace heater
finding hand me downs in closets
taking a bath and grooming then putting on a robe
makeup when it's just the two of you
medicated stuff and face creams
hand lotion and night cream
jewelry boxes full of old memories
looking at old photographs
being warm in the winter, cuddled up
cuddling up with the one you love
brushing your hair gently and looking in the mirror
trying on earrings, a dish for rings
Christmas lights and decorations all year round
removing makeup with cleansing wipes
reading old magazines in bed
looking beautiful no matter what one is wearing
hair up into a soft loose bun with bobby pins

"Kitchen List"
Rice Pudding simmering on the stove
Apples baking in the oven
Hot tea in a teapot with sugar and milk
Granola bars and fruit
Homemade Vegetable Soup, Vegetables Boiled in Broth
Biscuits and Cookies Made from scratch
French Toast and pancakes with bacon
Summer sausage with fresh tomato slices
Fried chicken breast, chicken breast with barbecue sauce
Boiled cabbage, baked cabbage and fish
Lasagna from Scratch with homemade marinara sauce
Fried Fish and Home Fried Potatoes
Key Lime Pie, Steak and french fries
Pot Roast with Roast Vegetables
Mashed Potatoes and Potato Salad

"True Love"
I Know Why They Say Love Is Omnipotent In The End
Because If You Have Faith You Can Do Anything You Set Your Mind To
Love Conquers the Odds Against itself With A Beautiful Relinquishing Glory
My Life Has Proven My Love For Theodore To Be The Most Powerful Magic
My Love For Theodore Is The Strongest Force In The Universe
It Cannot Be Altered Nor Broken, It Simply Is Like The Moon In The Window
And It Will Never Die
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

When We Were Young We Were Silly In Love
As We Grew Old We Stopped Speaking To One Another
We Forgot How To Make Love and Clung To One Another
Desperately and Hopelessly Like Nothing We Do Could Quench It
Your Wife Was A Great Poet, She Wrote Great Love Poems To You Every Day
And You Were A Cook At A Fancy Restaraunt, Bacon Salad and Carrot Cake
I Loved You With All My Heart And Soul And Wrote To You Every Day
We Were Somehow Happy and Somehow Silly After All Those Years
There Is Something Omnipotent in the Thing Called Love
Something That Can Overcome all darkness even when hope seems lost
No matter how hopeless Things seem, I can never lose hope to hold you
Because I love you more than Life and I am So Grateful To God for Giving my You
When We Were Young We Were Silly In Love!
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Love Poem"
I Wait For You As The World Falls Down All Around Us
I Wait For You As I am Slowly but surely dying
I wait for you when hope seems beyond reason or sanity
I wait for you as It grows dark and I am alone
I wait for you in the dark of night when I pretend to be asleep
And when I dream I wait for you
I wait for you when there is nothing left to hold on to but my heart
And when God calls me to take my life, still, I wait for you
I wait for you in the dark and light, Until you come home to me
And when You are in my arms I wait for you
I wait for your kiss to rejuvenate my soul
And when you sleep I wait for you
Safety Is the feeling that everything will somehow be O.K.
That everything will have a rhyme and a reason somehow
You could also call it "Faith" In faith we live and breathe
In faith we get up and work and live and go back to sleep
In faith the world believe it will be okay
My love for you is complete and deep and it grows every day
In faith my love for you is made complete
In faith I find myself holding you again and ever endlessly again
In faith I Know I Will see you in heaven, that place To Which I Go
and I fear no fate and no world, because I love you more than I know
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Pain and Love"
Some Days I feel as though life will surely go on, day after day
as though there were no force that could stop life from going on
My faith in God leads me to trust in the Great Design, in being meant to be
If I am alive, I am meant to be alive, and I will never die
Someday I may, but I had no idea I would ever be this sick
It were almost as though I were prevented from being alive
I struggle to breathe while you are away, and when you are with me
I cannot leave this wretched earth because you are holding me in your arms
I hold you in my own arms and when You push me away my heart cries out
it is worse to be beaten than to be pushed away I think, if only you can hold me
softly in your arms, then everything will be okay then I can stay alive
I look at you and sense your pain the pain in you is dense and deep
I had never known how much I loved you until now, I have always loved you
When you push me away I die a little, I wait for time to pass, something in my heart
knows I will be reunited with you once again if I keep praying to God
Time Has shown us that by prayer and faith anyone can get to where they need to go
Your pain has rediced you into an abstract silence you are so calm trying not to scream
I will not let you fall apart, you are my child, I would die for you in the street
I love you madly, surely this madness is more than my love for you
surely I love you more than I love being alive, surely holding you is my cure
surely I can do absolutely anything for you and if you want to cure me, kiss me
your Kiss would abate these mountains of pain and interceded this vast delerium
Your Kiss would soothe my soul and I could die at peace, a wealthy heart
If I am dying it is because you will not kiss me I swear I could revive
Your pain is like a whirlwind I cannot stop it from spinning
desperately and fearfully careening out over time and space
my love for you will never die!
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Sea Boat"
You Hold Me Back At Arm's Length
I lay still, anticipating your next move, watching silently
The moments pass into hours, I wonder why you no longer seem to care
Why, when it is cold outside, you do not want to hold me In your arms
I Feel Like Crying and you are so quiet, I wonder how to save this life
I think, that if I wait here for you to come home every day, you will get better
the thought of a life, a world, without you in it, is utterly unbearable
i would rather die than be without you, and I die when you push me away
every day I wake up, and I hold on to sweet life, I cherish simply being alive
breathing In and Out, watching the Sun Glance across the walls,  I feel Joy
In little suspended moments of grace, and the knowing that you are coming home
my heart jumps with happiness at your hand on the doorknob, when you come inside
I somehow find the strength to go on, you keep me alive with your care for me
I still do not believe in death, I don't think I ever will, I cannot understand dying
I hold on while the voices course through my imagination, and let them pour forth
like fast moving water, I breathe softly, waiting for you to come home
you are as sick as me, sick in your heart, my heaven is to hold you, i dream of you
then I wake up, and listen to the silence of a room cruising through space and time
like a ship at sea, never reaching the port, just cruising on and on , through the deep sea
parting the ocean in its wake!
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Fear"
Some Days I Feel Hopeless
As Though There May Be No Answer
I Look Into My Heart and Find An Unshakeable Hope
I Don't give up because I believe in Everything
An Indefatiguable Never Giving Up
The Idea That My Heart Could Never Truly Break
The Heart Breaks Again and Again
It Seems To Be The End But Life Keeps Twisting
Over and Under It Goes Until You Get Lost
I Do Not Know Where We Go When We Die
And I Have Nightmares At Night
But My Hope is Unrelenting
I Have Never Given Up Hope And I Never Will
I could stare at The Moon a thousand times
And It Would Not Turn Me Into Stone
Thus Death Never Seems To Come
Though Life Grows More and More Painful
The More Pain Fills My Life The Harder I Pray
Hope Is Perhaps the Only Thing I've Written About
The Idea that, If One Never Gives Up,
That One Will Eventually Get To The Destination
The Idea That God Loves Us A Loving Father
Who Wants To Be With Us To Love Us
The Idea That There Is An Eternity Beyond Death
And That It Is Not A Hell
I Feel Heartbreak When I Go To Sleep At Night
My Dreams Are Nightmares and they Break My Heart
How Cursed These Fearful Dreams
I Fear That World and I Pray For That World
I Pray For God When I Wake Up, and For Myself
Perhaps My Nightmares are the Reason I Pray So Hard
I Lose My Mind At Night, Madness really Comes
And Most Nights I cannot sleep anyway
The Things that I have been Through Suggest a Heaven
The HArdness Of My Life Especially the later Years
It suggests the justice of a better place to go to
If There is no recompinsation for my life I think I will Cry
Because It Has Been Hell  And I Refuse To Give Up
I am incredibly tired and I am losing sight of time
Hope has become a word that I cling to
The Very Word Inspires such courage that I am happy
The Very Idea of Surviving makes me smile
The hope of Staying Alive, Of Being Happy
I Pray For Those Who Have Hurt Me A Million Times
And I Really Do BElieve In God
I have never Given Up Hope
As Darkness Falls in So Many Ways I Grow Increasingly Afraid
Afraid for my life and finally afraid for Hope itself
I feel that whetever Has Been Chasing My This Far
Should Have Given Up By Now Or Gotten Lost
And That Is A Haunting Feeling.  Will My Heart
Ever Heal?  Wounds Break My Heart The World Breaks My Heart
The Camel's Back Grows Weary and Tired I Start Crying
I Feel Like God Should Have Answered Me By Now
God Is So Angry Apparently That I Don't Know What To Do
I am afraid Of God Deep In My Heart
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Angel"
When I Was A Child I Always Wanted To Become A Great Poet
I Went To School And Studied So Very Hard
I Fell In Love Like I Always Wanted To Do
And When He Broke My Heart I Grew Wings And Flew Away
Like an Angel
In Jesus' Name,
Amen!

"The Doll's House"
I Fear My Doll's House Has Been Occupied
How Dare They Intrude Upon The Rhythms Of My Beating Heart
The Devil Walk Over The World In The Night
The Camelias Whisper And Fall In The Wind It Is Cold Here
But Not As Cold As My Heart That Has Been Occupied
"Get Off Of My Planet" I Cry Weeping, I Pray For Them
They Are Raping My City And Plundering My Heart
I Feel Lost Like A Woman Being Taken Advantage Of
The Scorn In My Heart Forms Tears And They Move Away Slowly
I Have Been Writing Poetry So Very Long, I Reminisce, And I Cry
You Broke My Heart, I Loved You Once, And Occupy My House
"Get Out Of My Home" I Cry In My HEart, Too Stunned To Speak
The SIlence Is Beating So Heavy And Deep
I Want To Eat Cereal But My Heart Now Feels like Cereal
I Look At My Doll's House And See The Lights Are On
My Dolls Cry With Me And I Drink Tea On The Couch
Haunted, I feel my Dolls Hold My Hands Like My Children Do
They Play In Their House While I Drink My Tea
Overthrow My Doll's House and Overthrow My Home
A Bird's Nest Couldn't Be As Quaint
Eat My Food Drink My Tea Your Class Is Showing
And Get Off My Planet And Out Of My Home
Leave Me To Bask In This Forest Of Memory
The Doll's House Beats In Me Reminiscent Like A Dream
And I Want To Go Home
To Run Through The Night Wildly Like A Frightened Animal
I Laugh At You And The Pain Is Like a Lightening Bolt
Sadly, You, I See, Are Lost
Leave Me Alone
The Silence Is So Real and Deep
If I Died Now I Couldn't Find A Greater Peace
No I Will Never Ever Die!
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Home"
The Peace Is In My Heart Like A Slow Muddy River
Moving In The Night As Though Through An Unfathomable Dream
My Home, My Home, And Ghosts Are In It
Like The Universe in Its Void, I Wish That They Would Leave Me
My Heart Is Like The Martian Surface Like Some Faraway Dream
I Wander And Wonder Why, Why I Cannot Return Home
Sometimes I Believe Mars Is Really My Home
I Feel so very Lost And Alone On Earth
No One Understands Me and The World Doesn't Know What It's Doing
To Me To Their People To The Sanctity Of The Night
The Night IS A Sanctuary Can't You See, The Silence Is Real And Deep
How Dare They Invade My Funerary Keep
Soft And Slow The River Courses Within My Great Heart
Like My Heart Were A Pile Of Rocks And The River Played On It Like A Drum
Like My Heart Wanted To Go Back Home, Rested Like A Displaced Bird In A Tree
Nearby Perched I Looked at You and I Looked My Heart Unraveled
The Meaning Of Mars Is Love, I Thought, And Mars Is Within Me
And How Dare They and I Stand Alone Here On My Cold Precipice
I Have Never Been That Lost
And I Probably Never Will Be Again
I Don't Want To Be Here I Want To Go Back Home To MY Willolyn Hall
I Want My Peace To Be Returned To Me
I Wait For Ghosts To Fade And I Pray That God Will Have Mercy
Like Demons The Wedding Guests Eat At My Heart
I Would Turn Them To Stones But I Cannot Walk Far Enough To Turn Them
And I Do Not Have The Heart To, For I Loved Them Once
One Day I Will Go Back To My Home
They Understand Some Diurnal Meaning A Truth To My Heart
Like "Home" Was A Place You Never Leave
And I Pray I Can Find That Peace Here Again
In This World
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"The One"
The Little Flowers In My Hair Were Crying
As We Sailed Among The Ghosts Of The Dead
I Hear What I Hear But I Cannot Say Nor Tell
What I Hear Is My Own To Keep In A Silence Real and Deep
It Is Not Yours Nor Theirs It Belongs To Halls And Caverns of Silence
This Silence That Is Mine And The Peace That Dwells Therein
I Loved You And Then I Lost You I Loved You Still
On and On I Loved You Then I Cried Some Tears
They Fell Hard Like Metal Drops From My Broken Eyes
Then The Little Flowers Fell From My Hair
As The Wind Brushed Them From My Face
And Down My Cheeks and Over My Pretty Brow
I Smiled To Think That I Lost The One I Wore Them For
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"The Nightmare"
I Had A Nightmare About You Deep Within My Heart
You Were Wearing Some Gaudy White Wedding Gown
And You Were An Old Man With Terrible Long Hair Like a Girl
I Watched You Take My Things And Creep Into The Night
It Was The Strangest Thing Like The Devil Were In You
You Looked Crazy And Possessed and Then You Married My Imaginary Friend
Deep In My Heart You Married My Other Half and I Cried
My Other Half Is My Other Half, I Sadly Muse, But You Have Married Him
What Bit Of Sadness Is Left Then For Me, I Wonder With A Great Wonder
All My Friends And Family Were There Like The Hotel California
They Were Dancing To Some Chant And Weeping Like Demons In Hell
I Thought It Was The Strangest Thing I Had Ever Seen
And Then You Copulated With Him In The Funerary Hall
I Blinked And Was Gone!
Gone, Like The Will O The Wisp
Gone, Like The WInd In Your Hair
Gone, Like The Love That We Shared
Gone Like wild Birds Leaving My Heart
Gone, Like My Heart
Gone, Like A Candle Being Snuffed Out
Gone Like Your Virginity
Gone Like A Thousand Tears
Gone Like The Outgoing Tide
Gone Like Some Unraveling Thread
Gone Like The Soul Departing
Gone Is This Love That Is Never To Occur Again
Gone Departed From My Pale Tear-Streaking Heart
In Jesus' Name,
Amen!

"When One Has Loved And Lost"
When You Have Loved and Lost
There Is A Sadness Deep Within The Heart
You Wander Along The Seashore In Your Heart
Without Reason Without Aim Like The World Were Against You
When You Have Loved And Lost
Life Loses Its Meaning And Colors Turn Grey
You Remember the World Has Gone Mad And You Smile
When Life Is All Wrong One Cannot Help  But Smile
Remembering How Beautiful Things Used To Be
When The World Is Falling Down All Around You
You Feel Like Nothing Could Ever Be Okay Again
People Laughing People Shouting But All Within
A Great And Terrible Silence Chanting Into A Greater Lull
The Music of The Stars And You Just Want To Remain Alone
When You Have Loved And Lost You Just Want To Be Alone
You Wander Along The Seashore In Your Heart
May Peace Be Returned To Me In This Life and The Next
May The Love Of God Find Me In Moments of Doubt and Fear
May A Love That Ran Cold Be Lost In The Meadows and Forests of Memory
May My Heart Grow the wings of a snow white dove and fly away
May Things past and passing become a part of the past
Never to trouble the heart again May we find our way
Through the unending ripples of chaos that trouble the mind
madness engulfs one's heart madness pure like cold running water
there is no blood wound that could absolve this pain
you wonder if the world has gone mad if they are dancing chaotically
to the beat of some crazy drum scattering wildly into hell
the kind honest heart cannot help but grow weary at this chaos
you smile to yourself and attempt to move on with your life
If the sadness were any deeper its rivers would melt into an ocean!
In Jesus' Name,
Amen!

"Your Name"
The Wild Wind Whispers Your Name
As It Whips About Your Little Ankles
Walking Alone The Tall Grasses Know Your Name
The Moon And Stars Know Why You Came
They Tell Me As You're Drawing Near
That Someone Walks Who Has No Fear
That Someone Comes With So Many Dreams
That Hope Is Not as Far Away As It Seems
That Somehow We Will Stay Alive
That The man I love is still alive
That you are coming softly home to me
That day brings happy memories to be!
The Wind Cries out thy pretty name
I pray for thee, and do the same
I hear it when you're passing by
And I believe you;ll never die
No Victory was as sweet as thine
Thy life as a star forever Shines
That All life forces Bow to thee
Thy Grace the trees and birds do see
There is no path that thee cannot clear
And in my heart forever dear
My love you never will be Gay
And God Will Pray those clouds away
No man shall pass thy humble brow
it doesn't really matter how
your Holy Kingdom Shall Be Brought Again
Surely Thy Heart Must Never End!
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

We Were Alive This Holy Night
O Every Night And All
I took your hand and felt alive
I gave you my heart, we stayed Alive
may my heart for thee forever burn
though wind may blow and seasons turn
never a man as Great as You
Forever noble Good and true
I hope the waters break and part
before they learn to break your Heart
I hope the rivers dry away
Before thy dear self were taken away
Noone shall trespass upon you here
and never shall any awaken your fear
may you safely, soundly rest
and may your future be completely blessed
there never was a devil mean enough to scorn you
no cruel fate shall control nor harm you
there is really nothing that I anymore fear
this darkest season of the year!
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"A Great Man"
You are running wildly through the night
Wearing next to nothing arms and legs dancing
I wonder to whom it is that you run
and where it is you believe you are going
I hope you find that castle on the hill
the dream you are chasing with everything that you have left
as though each day were created for you to reach ever forward
as though giving up would be an insult to your pride
as though there were nothing that could ever break your heart
truly thee art a great man oh Theodore as the world has never seen
thee never needed to be a king to prove your glory to me
if riches and power were the intention of life and birth
you have a life of your own and you love me so much
i see you rise with all the intentions of an optimistic God
thy head never bowed, thy grief never overcome by pain
i believe you'll dare the sky forever and never end
this is the undying panting heart of the Man that I love
how dare the world increase upon your sorrow
I am so very proud that I married you
I'll never live to see thee run through the night in vain
To protect you is the path life has afforded me
and I truly Love you as much as the rain loves to fall
down, down, down=thus, is my love for you
Truly You are a Great Man!
In Jesus' Name
Amen

Creeping forward like a little vine reaching for water
I hold you in my arms
The fevers of night hold within them a terrible stillness
I try to keep you warm
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

We are born and we need things and we live and endure
We grow up and fall in love and have children of our own
The seasons bloom and fade the winter ebbs and goes away
We live to grow wrinkled and tired and worn we fall gradually apart
Then we are wiped effortlessly away like leaves in the winter wind
Noone lives to remember us and only the wind whispers our memory
What are we then?  Why are We born in embers enduring growing light
There is no reason to ignite and burn and fade away the sorrow of life
Every season comes and brings with it new fresh sorrows people die every day
I pray for you and look at life and the tears fill my eyes, how long must we wait
if life is pointless why are we here?  Why all the endless unrelenting sorrow
How can they be so cruel?  We are daily damned to die tomorrow
Waking in sadness and fear and sleeping with tenderly held hope
we never know when God is going to snatch us away from our lives
I just think It's terribly sad that life should be so lived in vain
That life unending repeats pain again and again
That one man's joy is sadly another man's grief
That we are all alost and so doomed to repeat
The same mistakes our fathers did and be cast into the cold
alone, alost and who will hear our stories told
in me the pain has found the source of all its sadness
In pain the heart has grown the fevers of terrible madness
It seems the hearts cries for the pointlessness of life
and though lost I go again to look for you in all my strife
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

They say we are all doomed someday to die.  I feel lost
as though all things were wiped clean away when we die
as though all things we struggle for are in vain and fleeting
if we lose everything even ourselves in the end it make me cry
how can we come into life and live and fade back into nothing
what was God thinking when He made us all so temporary
I find it ever harder to tell you goodbye in the morning
If I had it my way I'd be with you here for eternity
The temporary world seems to tear us apart
The Lord knows I love thee with all of my heart
Should you and I be someday torn apart
Just know I love you with all of my heart
I have never regretted marrying you
I know I surely never will
time is strange and sad and killing
but We'll defy that time the Gods Be Willing
We'll conquer death and touch the sky
No You and I will never die
In darkness finding How I Miss You
Crawling across covers just to kiss you
May we live to love forever
may time be damned and take us never
I love you dear with all my heart
I hope we never fall apart!
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Love Poem"
Soft Days Go By
My Love Is Sleeping Like a Rock
The Sun Is About To Rise
I feel so alive
They say life is brief
And it really is
That time is a thief
and that all joy must end
when my sorrows are heavy
and I can't find a smile
I look into my heart
And Find My Love
He sleeps that sweet sleep
Owed Him By the Gods
His Life Remains Untroubled and deep
and noone can disturb him
although the world goes on and on
my little one will be safe here
caressed in soft love and smiles
and in my ares forever dear
noone will trespass here
and there will be not a single tear
I'll wait for you for all these years
and darling I shall never die
I know why God created heaven
It was for little Ones like you
and in thy heart so gently beating
the hope of man forever true
in me the end of all your sorrows
in me find all your new tomorrows
I love thee more than I can say
and I will always find a way
for you to wake up every day
and in sweet dreams to softly lay
if you love someone you are alive
i wish that we could stay alive
nothing could break your little heart
and life all tearing us apart
how much you are held so precious dear
In me may you no longer fear
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

I still haven't lost my faith in God
The faith that everything is going to be okay
Somehow I still believe that things will get better
And when I pray, I don't doubt that someone hears me

"Liquid Faith"
A Light Is Liquid Faith
This One Is For Those Cold Nights
Those Nights When There Aren't Enough Christmas Lights
Cold Isn't a Temperature
It Is A State Of Mind
When The Heart Is Cold The World Is Cold
And That's A Fact.  That's All Anyone Can Do, Is Pray
That's All Christmas Lights Can Do
They Cast Out Darkness
That's What They Do
Light Is A Force That Can Heal and Cure and Endure
Light Is Among The Most Powerful Forces
Light Is Brave and Kind
Light Shines In Darkness
And It Shall Not Be Put Out
You Cannot Put Out A Light
Lights Burn Because They Believe In God
That is What A Light Is, Faith In God
A Light Is Liquid Faith
It is a remnant of the Divine
It Cannot Be Diminished Nor Extinguished
Light Cannot Be Put Out
If There Were No Light There Were No Life
Life Occurs Because Of Light
Because Of Faith
Because God Has Faith In Us
God Believes In Us
He Believes in the Earth and He Gave It Life
Life Will Go On and On As Long As There is Faith In God
If We Lose Our Faith In God We Lose
Everything
Including Hope!
In Jesus' Name,
Amen!

Blue Dawn Of Yellow Mountain
Night Lingers Breathlessly By
Little Flowers Bathing In The Moonlight
Streetlamps Glowing Overhead
Stars Bright Lighting Up The Night
Cars Passing Solitary on Empty Streets
Cigarettes In dirty Puddles on the Sidewalk
Sun refuses to look out over the world
people waking up for their breakfast
morning sounds rustle awake from sleep
noone is out at this unholy hour
Water flows softly as though asleep
Gathers itself and releases itself softly
Everything seems to be underwater
a lonely highway leading out of town

"Mountain Range"
When I Was A Little Girl My Parents Would Drive
All Day And Half The Night To The Mountains And Back
We Would Wind around the Gentle Curve of the mountain range
In Our Tuna Can MiniVan,  Skirting the edges of the mountainsides
The BlueRidge Parkway We Got Out and Hiked and Got Snacks
My Parents Would Head Home Late At Night By Getting off the curvy roads
And The Interstate Would Pound Softly Under The Treads Of The Tires
And I Would Lean My Small Bony Body, Usually Dirty And Wet,
against the floor heater and cover up with my coat and dream
In The Middle of the night my mother and father would pull up at our house
and gently slide open the side door of the Van and the cold air would rush in
and they would try to wake me up from my sleeping dreams but I was asleep
And My Father Would Pick Me Up And Carry Me Up The Stairs Gently
And My Mother Would Unlock the door and Pull Down The Covers
And The Would Lay Me Down Softly In Bed On My Feather Pillow
And Kiss Me And Tell Me Goodnight And I Felt So Safe
In Jesus Name,
Amen

I will run and run
faster and faster into the night
I will grow wings and fly away
and no one will weep for me!

"Delirium"
Eating Oatmeal and Juice
You Blow Into The Door Like The Wind
I have been drinking in my heart
I ignore you completely
There are better things to do than wait for you
There is no lack there is no loss
To lose is the greatest and worst form of knowledge
To lose is the worst pain it is indeed the cruelest medicine
the medicine was invented to break the heart
that's all medicine does that's all it ever is or was
it's all we have to keep us alive
i lay awake at four in the morning and stare into the abyss
i feel so far away from my past
the future seems impossible to get to
i think i got lost somewhere in the present
the present is precious and sweet
you think that just being alive will never ever end
there is no thing you can do any more
there is only this feeling of absolute loss
the breaking heart breaks and breaks
you feel yourself becoming something you cannot understand
and never will never were never was
delirium defeats purpose and you fall away into dreams
you forget why you are here and what life is for
you lost sight of all meaning and give in to sleep
you sleep all day and wake up in the middle of the night
it is a dark night the cars are rising and falling like crashing waves
the stars are calling awake and bright and far away
you feel the night becomes you more than the day
as though the day might reveal your shame
your pain the pain that you are falling apart
the pain that noone loves you but the dreams you dream
and even if they did, there is no way of showing it
like they could reach in and pull you out of something you don't understand
like a terrible car wreck that crushes your car like a shell
and it closes in all around you and you just want to sleep
you just want to sleep
In JEsus' Name,
Amen

"Alone"
A Blue Horse
Its mane flying wildly in the wind
A grey horse
like moonbeams or clouds or dreams
A Black horse
against a sea of sunflowers
When I am Old I Will Fall Into Your Arms
We Will Remember The Time When We Went Mad
And When I Decide To Die I'll Think Of You and Be Okay
I Die In My Heart Every Day again and again
There is something terrible I am afraid of out there
something terrible something dark and cold
i cannot explain this fear
if i run out of energy if i run out of time
i will fall into your arms
like a draping piece of heavy cloth
and I will rest, then
sorrows must somehow have an only end
perhaps the best feeling is to be warm and dry
when the dark and cold and drizzling rain
is beating down all around outside
you feel so safe and so alone
I love to feel alone
I love to be alone

When you have done your very best to do your best
They try and try I just want to succeed
sometimes I realize I'll never succeed so I give up and cry
It is the saddest thing in the world

When I am unhappy I cry but I can never find the tears
How could we be so betrayed?  The heart cries
The Heart cries with all that it has

I prayed for you, I covered my head
When being a woman isn't enough for a man
Then you feel hopeless you know you are pretty
but they will never see that you are pretty

When I think I cannot go on I pray with all my heart
They say "Life has Changed" but why has it changed?
I wrote a sad song and nobody cried
I wrote a million sad songs and nobody cares
and the crazy thing is, I don't think anyone ever will

Sometimes being strong is just enough to keep from crying
When you are unutterably human and find yourself alone
There is no help for it, there is no justifying it
There seems no hope for those who are lost
Maybe The Crazy thing is, they say they never get found

I feel lost and I look for myself but I never find my way back
Sometimes I feel happy just to be myself within myself
Sometimes I struggle for an escape but I find no escape
I Think "I'm Dying" and so it seems that I am

Alone and stranded after all these years
Why keep a happy home if there is noone to love you
this is why i feel deeply betrayed by God
because simple because noone loves me
and noone probably ever will, again

It makes me smile to think about my imminent death
The Irony of it is an insult to my very dignity
If I were any Prouder than this I would just cry
just cry and cry but I am too proud to even cry
I feel so very hopeless and sad



They Say "Each of Us Is Who We Are,"
But I really don't think it is so.
I think we are each just a long chain of choices
we go through life doing our best the best we can
we feel deeply lonely especially when not alone
I think we each die and our memory is wiped away
in more ways than one, in our existence and in memories
we die and we are forgotten that is why I promised myself
that I would never let myself become forgotten
I refuse to live my heart and let it be wiped away
I am not a memory.  If I die, there is nothing left at all
Sometimes I think Remembering Others Is The Kindest Thing
Sometimes the world seems so damned dim
sometimes I feel blind but somehow I can see
Sometimes the barrier of love ispushed apart by Many Oceans
Sometimes death just seems imminent
Sometimes one is afraid not of living but of dying
there is nothing so terrifying as dying
i die every night again and again but find no ending
even within my dreams it seems there will be no heaven
I simply refuse to believe there is nothing when we die
I simply refuse I just Pray I Pray all night and every day
I hope so
I Hope There Is Life After Death
I don't want to die
I don't think anybody does
Pain is the ultimate reality
When I am dying I fall to my knees
The Answer must surely come!
In Jesus' Name,
Amen!

The only thing lonelier than being alone on a beautiful night
is being alone and hungry on a beautiful night
when its raining

"Choices"
I Gave You My Heart, Like A Simple White Dove
How Could You ever have had the heart to Betray Me?
I waited under the moon like the Grass Blowing In The Meadows
It Seems I Shall Be Forever Waiting Here
Some Days I look for you and find you have left me here alone
I wonder if we are all going to die i wonder that all the time
Sometimes it seems the pure of heart suffer so much more than you think
We Think we know what good people we all are but we aren't good people
none of us are good people at all we are all just a series of choices
choices we made down the long line of our lives and you know what
we'd all better hope they were good choices nobody is born a good person
it's just a series of decisions we make whether to give or take from the world
choices whether to do good or evil to other living things choices of mercy and release
choices to give up and let it all go or keep on fighting for our lives
I loved you with all my heart and it wasn't a choice
I just loved you!
In Jesus' Name,
Amen